Dakota Johnson and I have one thing in common. We use pencils. That’s where the similarity ends. BDSM for me means Bad Drawing and Sketching Materials (as you’ll learn about later).

On the day of the Fifty Shades of Grey UK premiere at the Odeon in London’s  Leicester Square the studio shared a new film still of Dakota’s character, writer Ana Steele, provocatively pressing a pencil to her lips. It’s a very long pencil with ‘Grey Enterprises’ printed on it. The simple, subtle, but suggestive pose is a good deal more innocent than other images they could have released.

So I took my trusty Pilot super grip clutch pencil with its 4B lead and did this quick sketch, rolled up at the premiere, standing amongst mostly female fans of the book, screaming for “Jamie, Jamie!” (The Grey guy in the film) who didn’t walk the line, signing for the throng. Dakota, however, did. I put the sketch out and she happily signed it “Good job…. nice” using a thick, blue felt pen marker.

The sketch proved too hot, however, for the two sheets of plastic corflute I sandwiched it between to protect it from damage and the weather ‘melting’ the ‘graphite content’ and leaving a lineal imprint of my lead with the corrugated lines through Dakota’s face.